Friday, April 5, 2013

ppd (post partum discussion): breastfeeding

holy goshness! thats one loooong hiatus but for me it just yesterday when i shared our ttc journey.  now i understand why those ttc blogs become silent after delivery.  yes, i was once like those readers who say: "what happened? she's no longer posting." well, trying to have a baby is one journey to tackle. having one is a different ballgame.

now its almost 6 months post-delivery and i've enjoyed and endured  every second of it. this will be my first post on being a mom. and as i see it, i'd better start with the first item i dealt after giving birth to C... let me share my breastfeeding experience.

remember my previous post that i want to breastfeed all the way. when the nurse handed baby C to me, i was thinking what go wrong.  this is the most natural thing between a mom and a baby. when my baby latched, i didn't feel any pain at all. it was all good. that was day 1. when my pain meds wore out, i was in pain! my nipples were sore, it was just day 2. baby C latch every hour and feeding would last almost the entire hour. that gives me just a few minutes to compose myself. i fear every moment someone says "feeding time". with the law on breastfeeding and the hospital advocacy, i was not allowed to give my baby formula. i tried pumping but the drop of milk couldn't even reach the bottle. by day 3,  i didn't want to feed baby C. i screamed at P. i cried. my nipples were bleeding, yes, both of them. P feared that i would succumbed to post-partum depression just because of breastfeeding.

BF advocates would say its because of improper latch. the nurses taught, helped and assisted but it still hurts like hell. you couldn't ask them to be with you every time you feed your baby and correct your position. the baby still would suck and cry the way she wants. it was a battle.  before i went home, i wanted a formula prescription. my pedia obliged due to my bleeding nipples.

when we got home, P fed C with bottle formula for the first time. our reaction: baby was happily feeding and content. i was in no pain. P was just happy and called it miracle. we were silent for a moment... even C was content. she slept well, no colic. i was able to sleep. choosing formula over bm seems like an ideal option. but i didn't want to lose this battle. once the bleeding stopped and despite P's protest, i let C latched on me. it was still painful but i was adamant. i focused on how warm C was, how cute her eyes, how little her fingers were.  little by little, i decreased C's formula intake and within one week, its just one formula a day. the following month we're back to ebf (exclusively breastfeeding).

i am proud with my achievement. up to this day, even if i'm working full-time at the office, C and i are ebf. its hard and stressful, i have to confess but i feel fulfilled. its the best bonding moment with my baby and i'm now enjoying every minute of it. my nipples are numbed, i would have to say.  she would latched incorrectly and it wouldn't bother me now. once her first tooth break out though is another story, hahaha. but for now, we're all happy.

next time, i will share how i increase my milk supply... oh, its no miracle, i'd say. but as the saying goes: no pain, no gain. i've been to a lot with ttc, i'd say i can do this... i really can, for C :)

Friday, October 26, 2012

recounting the d-day

to all who have followed my journey thru getting pregnant, good news.  i've finally delivered a 7lbs 6oz baby girl last october 19.

we were very eager to meet our precious firstborn eversince i reached my 37th week.  by that time, i could deliver the baby in full term.  unfortunately, we had to wait a bit longer.  i was constantly feeling my baby's movements since the bpp result showed a cord coil.  non-stress test were also requested to which the baby responded ok (thank God!).

on the 40th week, my ob said that external os is 1-2cm opened but the internal os is still closed - in short, my cervix is closed. i don't have any regular contractions either.  walking was first advised by my doctor. it didn't work.  i drank pineapple 3x a day... still nada.

everyone was getting anxious.  my mom was even fearful that i might lose the baby like she did.  her firstborn did not make it because she was overdue.  i got scared... i'd go crazy if ever i lose my baby at this point.  we finally decided to get induced. 

around 1pm last oct 18, we checked in at st lukes global city labor room to be admitted.  we were lucky that there's only a few patients in labor that we were given the high-risk pregnancy unit.  here, you can stay with your hubby while in labor.  the room had a la-z boy and flat screen tv. not bad.

anyway, i was given shots of buscopan and gel-like capsules to soften my cervix. by 1am the next day, my cervix is dilated 2cm and was advised to walk within the premises.  after 2hours of walking, my ob checked again and was surprised that my cervix was floating again (high) and still 2cm. i was given oxytocin to get contractions.  the contractions will help open up my cervix and push the baby out.

at 4pm, i was 5cm (wohoo). my water bag ruptured and my ob said she expect a faster progress. within 2-3 hours i should be able to push the baby out otherwise its CS for me.  the contractions were regular (every 2 mins) .... and very painful.  i opted for an epidural as im not sure i can take the next level of pain.   at 6pm, they checked again... still at 5cm. my ob suspected it had something to do with the cord coil.  by 8pm, im still at 5cm so it was indeed a CS procedure.  i dont care as long as my baby is ok.

i was prepped for CS in the delivery room.  before the baby came out, my ob asked my hubby inside the DR to cut the cord.  he saw the guts, gore, blood and all. before i knew it, i heard her cry. it was the best sound i heard in my life. only her head was out and she's already crying.  there was indeed a cord coil. hubby cut her cord and the nurses cleaned her.  the pedia said she's fine and she put my baby on my chest to latch.

best day ever! the wait is over and we finally meet my little princess.

Friday, October 12, 2012

the waiting game

warning: hormonal preggy on the loose
i feel like a freaking timebomb without a way of knowing the date, time and even the place of my detonation! today, im 39 weeks and 3 days pregnant with three false alarms in the past two weeks. let me back up... i know that i haven't posted anything for a long time.
last saturday, i had by biophysical profile @ st lukes global city. everything's ok like always. baby scored 8/8 which is perfect. amniotic fluid is at 16cm which means its not critical. the volume can still provide our baby a perfect environment. great! but then there was this note: two loose nuchal cord coil. what?!!! cord coil... i googled "nuchal" and that means cord wrapped around the neck. NO! not just one, but two! my ob assured me that its perfectly fine since the coil isn't tight and i have lots of fluids that it may come off before i give birth. the catch is that i have to be more conscious of the baby movements with her condition.
so for the past few days, i would wake up (sometimes during odd hours) and if i don't feel my baby moves, i'd panic. just today, i woke up a sunken belly button (which btw has been protruding since sept) and felt to movements. i called my mom, my brother, my sister-in-law to ask if it was normal. i also sent an sms to my ob. the good thing is that my ob is very responsive. one sms and the response will come almost instantly. she wanted me to do NST today. that's non-stress test to ensure that the baby is fine. someone i knew from the forum gave birth yesterday via emergency CS when her baby heart rate fell to 88bpm then rises to 190bpm. im always afraid... i just want everything to be fine... for the baby to be healthy and ok. and for me to see her soon.
im at the office right now... i'm going out for an NST. the sooner i get assurance that baby's fine, the better. will update you, soon.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

entering the final round

wohooo! im on my 3rd and final trimester. just so you know, it gets scarier each day. last monday, i vomitted 5x after dinner. i was frantic and texted by doc j.  she called me and told me if i have blurred/double vision. nope, but i did have a light headache. she asked what i ate and ... well i threw up the chocolate mousse cake (guilty).  she said it must be it. no more sweets for now. she told me to monitor my BP... (oh, i still have to buy myself one of those battery-operated BP monitors). and if it continues, i have to go to the hospital. good thing, its just for one night. my next checkup will be this saturday. we're scheduled for a 4-d on aug 18 as well.

but after that incident, i became more aware of the baby's movements.  her kicks are getting more frequent and it builds up more excitement.  this is when i realize... the day that i prayed for years will come soon.

hectic, that's how my months are.  i'm still reporting to work everyday and on weekends, P and i go south to inspect the baby's nursery.  yup, we're moving from our little condo unit to P's family house. he converted the balcony to a new room for us.... well mostly for the baby. everybody knows it once they stepped into the room.  it was painted pink... davies ballerina pink. im not sure how P's going to retain his masculinity but heck, he was the one you chose the color. hahaha.  he did bought himself a black la-z boy and i (finally) agreed he can transfer his plasma tv inside the room.  we also recently bought a king-sized bed last weekend during the SM Homeworld 3-day sale. i'll try to take photo's of the nursery-slash-bedroom once its finished... hopefully by next week.

as for baby items, we went to hello baby in bel-air makati to buy some. the setup is like that of a warehouse. they carry carter brands and prices are much lower than the one offered in the malls. im not sure though if we covered everything.  we thought we can buy a few clothing items for now then buy another set once the baby's here.  but at least we almost have the most important items.

sterilizer and feeding bottles - i've decided to breastfeed. but of course P might want to feed the baby himself. also, when i go back to work, i need to fill up these bottles for the yaya.  we bought tommee tippee sterilizer set that comes with feeding bottles already.  we'll buy more if it's not enough... but for now, im ok with this.

carseat - im not sure how some parents can afford to drive their newborns home without a carseat. i know PH doesn't have a law against this and for some, this is not important. but i'm not going to risk my baby's safety.  even if P's a safe driver, i never can guarantee the other drivers we might meet along the way.  i watched a video before where an infant was thrown out of the car window on collision. the mom was holding the baby but the impact was so intense that the baby flew out of the car into the wall. (shivers!!!)  so yes, this this is a critical item for me.  we found some carseat we liked online and in stores and we're still undecided.  P and i both loved the hello kitty brevi carseat but its around 13k or so. mothercare madrid is around 7k. and there's someone selling the phased-out mothercare seville for 5k. both carseat is pink in color.  we'll probably make a decision before the month end.

crib or playard - our greatest dilemma. we wanted a playard to make sure that the baby won't bumped her head on a hard wooden crib.  but P suggested we buy a wooden crib for now and then buy a playard once she starts crawling. i guess we'll see within the month. we'll ask around how much for a white wooden crib.

stroller -  nope, we're not buying this yet.  i don't see any travel plans until my baby can handle the weight of  her head.  probably after 3 months or so. 

breastpump - i need one but i would probably buy a month before i go back to work.

i'm not sure if i've covered everything. for now, i just wanted to finish our room so i have a place to store all the items we bought.  i'll try to take pictures and post it here soon.

Sunday, July 22, 2012

update on 27 months

actually, its almost my 28th week. baby and me are fine, thanks for all the prayers. i just had my oral challenge glucose test last saturday.  the results are just as great, its 88mg/dL. normal results is  anything below 140. i also had my congenital exam last june 9 and baby is healthy. and you know what, our baby's a girl!

P and i are so excited.  we started buying baby clothes, sterilizer and are hunting for a nice carseat. we also decided to live with my in-laws once the baby is born. P is transforming the balcony to a nice little room for us. everyone is soooo excited. even my dad named our boat by our baby's name, hahaha. i just pray that everything will continue to be smooth sailing.

Monday, June 4, 2012

20 Weeks and 6 Days

i know i haven't posting much recently.  after the first trimester, everything's been quiet and in my case, its a good-kind-of quiet.

when i was diagnosed with threatened abortion and subchorionic hemorrhage (SCH), i was scared that my pregnancy will turn into something dreadful.  that and numerous vomiting incidents coupled with abdominal cramps made by first trimester horrible.  i was becoming a pessimist that i didn't know if i should tell people i'm pregnant.

but now that i've entered my second trimester, everything is topnotch.  SCH is gone, and the cramps were replaced by flutters within the inside. this is my first time to experience it so i'm not sure if its the baby.  i've google-d how to confirm if its fetal movements but the descriptions are all vague to me.  i'd say, the feeling is like another pulse within, but with longer intervals and then fades immediately.  it usually happens whenever i lie on my left side at night-time.  the feeling isn't painful at all and it does excites me a bit knowing that i'm indeed pregnant.

now the big question is, is the baby a he or a she. P is more excited than i am on this aspect; my guess its a girl, his guess... a boy.  during his birthday, we tried to know the gender of our baby. we went to de los santos @ sm megamall to have an ultrasound.  the sonologist said she didn't see any "lawit" and its likely to be a girl.  i was 16 weeks that time and she said that the position of the baby isn't helping her much. she also told me she'd seen someone who's at 13 weeks and confirmed its a boy since the fetal position allowed her the best view.  then at 19 weeks, we tried again @ in my womb, sm megamall. this time the sonologist said its 90% girl since she was able to see a "line".  but then, she backtracked saying its too early to tell. *sigh*.

P, however was convinced our baby's a girl. while he's ready to buy everything pink and girly, i still wanted to wait for that 100% confirmation.  this saturday, we will have our congenital anomaly scan.  i was supposed to do it last saturday but since P is still in singapore, we just have to wait until he comes back.  hopefully we'll be able to know the gender... *all fingers crossed* but most importantly, we both pray that our baby is ok and perfectly normal.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

on the 13th week

hello!!! im thankful to all of you who have been supportive thru my TTC days.  and so far everything is ok.

here are some updates since my last post:
another 2-week wait for the fetal heartbeat after the 2-week wait for PT.  during this time, i realized morning sickness was not limited to mornings. i throw up everything i eat plus, as my husband put it, i have gained wolverine's sense of smell. i vomit if something smells which includes the smell of cooked beef, garlic, onions, smelly men.  it was awful; im always fearful of nausea since the following day i am to expect AF. P kept on reminding me its because im pregnant.

feb 24 - our tvs schedule
fetal heartbeat is 120bpm, hurrah! but then the sonologist found SCH, subchorionic hemmorhage on the inferior pole.  my ob-re put me in progesterone vaginal cream and duvadillan.  i was put to bed rest as well and was told that i was to limit getting on my feet except during eating and bathroom breaks. another 2 weeks of waiting to check the viability of the pregnancy. i tell you, its scary knowing that we're almost there but not quite yet.

march 10 - good news
SCH is gone and our baby is doing fine with 168bpm. my ob-re said i should continue folic acid and then gave  me a free sample of enfamama drink. if i dont like the taste, i dont have to force myself, she said. good thing because i hated it.  i had an episode of exorcist-like vomitting after drinking it.  house arrest was uplifted but she also prescribed duvadillan and duphaston in case of emergency.  duvadillan is for uterine cramping, duphaston for spotting.

march 20 - mild cramps
since i went back to work, i began experiencing menstrual-like cramps.  the travel to and from the office was unbearable. i had to bring plastic bag coz i feel nauseated. i took duvadillan once this evening since the cramping did not stop after 30-minute rest. we were both agitated. good thing i had a scheduled 8-day leave coming up.

march 30 - work from home
after my vacation leave, i felt so much better. thats when P and i had the talk regarding work. this pregnancy is too important for us, so much more than my career.  i called my manager this day and requested to work from home for at least two months.  if not, i'd like to take a leave of absence. in the back of my mind, i thought i can even take an early retirement if they dont approve my request.  we were both glad that the company is every supportive and they allowed me to work from home.

april 1 - P went to SG
in an effort to earn additional income, P accepted a project in SG for a month.  this will be the longest time we spent apart since we hooked up year 1999.  but P was decided on saving up his per diem for the baby.  im currently staying at P's family house until P gets back. my in-laws are the best!  im being spoiled rotten here.

april 6 - cramps are back
come morning i felt pinching on my lower abdomen. i rested but it was still there. FIL wanted to bring me to ER.  they thought its because of our visita iglesia. i opted to send an sms to my ob-re. she replied back after a couple of minutes saying i should take duvadillan for 2 days.  i should see here asap if it continues. luckily, it didnt and i was scheduled for my doppler scan on apr 14.

apr 14 - first time we heard the heartbeat
i graduated from tvs!!! today is my appointment with my ob. i raised my concerns, headaches/migraines- can take paracetamol, gassy and bloated - avoid soda, iced tea, veggies with seeds including nuts. then she told me she would like to hear the baby's heartbeat via doppler. since P is not around, ob suggested i record it. P was decided on saving up his per diem for the baby. i felt nervous at first but when i heard the heartbeat for the first time, i feel elated. P was decided on saving up his per diem for the baby.

i will continue taking folic acid for the next 16 days and then change my vitamin set to clusivol ob, iron, vit. c and something i forgot. i just wish P was here but SIL was with me as proxy, hahaha. we even bought new set of bras since i needed bigger size. yes! instant boob job! my weight is the same though.

next sched will be pelvic ultrasound after 4 weeks. or whenever P is back. apparently, he was requested at jakarta after sg. i miss him so much but we're both happy that everything is great!
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